Romantic Terrorism

A novel heading, with two remotely dissimilar words lodged together like two peas in a pod.  What an unlikely couple.  When I first saw this term i couldn't fathom the product that this bond could make.

Romantic Terrorism -  The act of terrorising someone in a loving fanciful way.

The above sounds really scary.  Not.  However underneath the smiles and the facade of the word Romantic - http://www.thefreedictionary.com/romantic is the hidden clue that busts this cage apart.  If you add a little Terrorism - http://www.thefreedictionary.com/terrorism  it all becomes a little clearer.  This is about the insidiously friendly millitant attributes associated with romance and love.  Is there any freedom anymore from the combatant millitia that lie in wait for some hapless passerby.   

Shooting at the walls of heartache, bangbang, I am the warrior, I am the warrior, heart to heart you'll win, if you survive... - Scandal

Just a little feel good ditty to inspire someone to fall in love.  Pat Benatar also describes love as a "Battlefield".  I am seeing some clues manifest in songs.  If love is such a hassle why do people bother? My guess it is something akin to birthing children.  The body conveniently forgets how painful it is so the woman haplessly co-creates again.  This is the bodies way of tricking her so she only remembers how painful it was, moments before she goes into labour.  In the same way a person forgets about that unkind person they have been in a relationship with for the past few years, when a handsome man walks past.  Romance could be the prelude to creation, so therefore foreplay?  I am not the "Love doctor" so I can only theorise.

I found this odd word whilst struggling to find something interesting to do on a unusually quiet evening.  I even went as far as picking up the remote to the television to surf the movie channels.   Boring...Boring...I'm about to give up...Ahhh, this looks interesting.  I caught the ending of a movie with a catchy write-up about a neurotic man recounting the details of his past romantic failures. 

This is what I got from the movie.

Successful sulking
-  A Guide

1. The sulk must be sparked by some wrong doing.  The more trivial the better.
2. The punishment inflicted by the sulk must be disproportionately large in relation to the the original offence.
3. Beware of making sulking too short and therefore not allowing sufficient guilt to build up in the sulked.
4. The sulk should never be about the incident that sparked it.
5. The sulk should be gauged a success if, and only if, the sulker has to be talked out of the sulk by the sulked.

Romantic terrorism - Manipulating someone to like you by inflicting emotional pain?

I have done that before and can safely conclude that it doesn't work.  I have however experienced it in many forms.  I'll even give them pet names.

THE MIND MAGICIAN

This one likes to manipulate the way you think.  He loves to listen to you talk.  He is actually trying to find out clues as to what you like so that he can use that information to his advantage.  He is usually after sex.  If you like older men he changes his age.  If you like younger men hes all of a sudden youthful.  He assertains what kind of girl you are then he becomes that in which you like.  I call him the mind magician because he will establish his dominance in being the one who gives good advice then he will make a few little offhand comments here in there about what you should do...which usually leads to him.  "I think the best order of things is firstly Mental stimulation, the sexual stimulation then I think you should do the relationship card after that"  Oh, convenient, look here we are exchanging ideas so I wonder what should we do after that?  I hate being mind-fucked, it really gets on my nerves.

THE PUT YA DOWNER

This guy rarely has a kind word to say about you, but he loves you.  Oh, how sweet.  Your arse is never quite small enough, your not that bright, your sense of fashion is well...lacking.  This one stuffs around with your self-image so you do not believe anyone else could find you remotely likeable or attractive. 

I'm sure anyone could come up with a few of these types.  I am just getting angry thinking about them so I will stop.   But not before I share something remarkable that a guy told me once.  He calls it the "Wingman manoevre".  This is a technique used by men to get the good-looking girl away from her friend for his friend.  Let me explain.

By his observations girls always have a good-looking slim chick and a fatter uglier friend.  The good-looking one always gets the guys.  But the hassle is trying to extract her from the uglier friend.  It is the job of the "Wing man" to take one for the team and hit on the ugly chick so his mate can have the good-looking one.  If the "Wing man" takes the fatter chick home then chances are the attractive one will have a greater chance of going home with his friend.  For coffee...wink wink.

It looks like it could be a bit of a jungle out there my friends.  Best keep ya wits about ya...or if you are in for challenge or a pleasant surprise...don't.